river icarus / birdland

mctavish

^

  • my hands were made of
  • bone & pulsing sound
  • i was a red wagon
  • black crow / blue bottle

^

  • dark wings
  • beat 3 times
  • & then
  • a queer
  • suspension
  • darkness &
  • pin hole
  • illuminations
  • no landmarks
  • no compass
  • tracks roads
  • intersecting webs
  • rivers —
  • a rushing turbulence
  • a sinew & pulse
  • dark marrow
  • blood & barren plains
  • shadow rock & fire
  • an iron railing
  • & time
  • seas rise
  • boats capsize
  • swallow water
  • turn & drown
  • dark waves erase
  • the passage
  • down
  • there were lights above
  • unmoved
  • while lamps below
  • flickered & burned
  • vast & deep
  • broken glass
  • stitched into dark blankets
  • of sleep
  • rocks aged
  • cyclones circled
  • a bird's
  • slate eye

^

  • raven feathers splayed
  • across the indigo cloud
  • beast or loom or cliff
  • a spider scales glacial walls
  • a radio tower pierces the sky
  • clouds gather
  • a transmission
  • low & hurried
  • static —
  • the machine itself
  • begins to speak
  • electrical pulse
  • vibrating plates of glass
  • wires intersecting
  • red black white
  • barbed wire transmission
  • an orchestra concert
  • from Royal Albert Hall
  • before the bombing
  • commercial interlude
  • blue coal white appliance
  • red letters steel borders
  • cargo train trucks
  • & planes
  • knifelike wanderers
  • a sign 2 roads
  • voyage of goods
  • to odessa
  • to new york
  • to madrid
  • to portland
  • past abandoned farms
  • fallen towns rusted track
  • past incinerations
  • past temples & bars
  • iron horse iron lung
  • combine turning
  • gold fields blue smoke
  • under the high bridge
  • birds & ghosts
  • dusty hYmn
  • white gray
  • paint
  • concrete canvas
  • fallen feathers
  • splintered caws
  • a cavern of birds
  • ceiling of birds
  • bridge of birds
  • coat of birds quick silver
  • cloak of birds
  • dark & trembling storm
  • the boats were green blue red
  • pale sails
  • anchors heavy
  • & iron & braided with sea
  • ropes
  • slowly plumbing the depths
  • anyway there was a map
  • industry!
  • progress!
  • we had a plan
  • we had time on a spool
  • or wires on a spool
  • or a snake skin with a map
  • or a spoon
  • we had a shiny spoon
  • a wheel & fire
  • machines wheels talking wires
  • fire
  • & lots of things to burn
  • rock & roll factory
  • spoons & knives
  • axes & lightning
  • lightning on a spool
  • a voyage of goods
  • timetables & maps
  • & silver roads
  • silver snakes
  • & a rope
  • a pulley a rope
  • a factory a boat
  • a plane & sky
  • skyscrapers
  • windows like birds
  • higher than birds
  • higher than gods
  • high as stars
  • higher than stars
  • we had skyscrapers
  • & planes & windows
  • & stairs winding up past clouds
  • stairwells & lights & vast landscapes
  • of asphalt
  • roofscape fire escape flashlight
  • a stairwell a window a street
  • fires below & stars

^

  • wings & dark mountain
  • shadow mountain — a cliff
  • perilously close
  • a breath a moth
  • an illuminated distance
  • a stillness before raging nights
  • wind gathering force
  • a spring a wheel
  • rain factory sleet factory
  • lightning on telephone wires
  • gripping the kite — a static suspension
  • the key aflame
  • wings beating
  • toward shore
  • distant gray lines
  • taut heart beat swift

^

  • 3 birds
  • laughing
  • whose last laugh?
  • 3 birds last bird coughing bird
  • anyway the factory was going well
  • conveyer belts burning rubber
  • tires pulling freight past trees & signs
  • & swamps
  • highways roads & concrete bridges
  • golden arches
  • music on the radio
  • a bottle of coke
  • the marlboro man
  • red & white package
  • tightly bound
  • white shirt sleeves
  • rolled up against the heat
  • a swollen heat a humid sea
  • of green & gray & grit
  • radio smoke rings
  • smoke signals
  • drowsy black asphalt
  • yellow line

^

  • whispers
  • pulse
  • shadows moving
  • frozen hands
  • a clock
  • arctic stillness
  • ice
  • a blue darkness chill gray
  • & steam through grates
  • a silence
  • chalk on slate
  • blue window
  • red chair chrome feet
  • a fluorescence
  • stairs ascending
  • dim yellow light
  • dusty rays waking
  • tired sun
  • clouded
  • incandescent
  • sun
  • pull-chain-porcelain-filament
  • sun
  • it was like this every morning
  • same train
  • same chair
  • same window
  • same tap water drip
  • or brook
  • & rusted bridge
  • iced metal thrumming
  • same bus or concrete sidewalk
  • trash can alley
  • aluminum percolator
  • stained glass bulb
  • brown liquid
  • blue blue morning

^

  • chalk & black slate
  • a formula or system
  • deciphered
  • a bifurcation
  • group theory
  • a flaw in the arithmetic
  • vectors differentials
  • copied into black books
  • a slight variation
  • parameters altered
  • a solution
  • sought
  • to simplify
  • 3 things
  • hold up this space
  • a basis for turning
  • a transformation or mapping
  • find
  • a simpler set of lines
  • a stable state
  • a zero
  • or one

^

  • people were saving daylight
  • small blue squares of light
  • small extinctions
  • 3 then 2 then 1
  • rungs marked off in notches
  • fabric of millenniums
  • fossils really
  • carbon feathers muscle
  • then stone
  • an empty cage
  • a hollow ocean
  • but anyway
  • i liked color & light
  • the way shadows held a sound
  • textures frictions
  • joining of pitch
  • horse hair & wire
  • scraped across the chest
  • eyes split by light
  • light hYmn
  • threads & loom & glass
  • broken places
  • a wooden room
  • resonance
  • box
  • echo chamber
  • hallways
  • old cathedrals
  • warehouse caverns
  • holy spaces
  • sound
  • a silo of birds
  • a bridge in flight

^

  • i always wanted to be my father
  • wooden hammer wire nails
  • the smell of gasoline engines
  • wool shirt boots
  • asphalt shingles
  • clamps & glue
  • old metal tackle box
  • hinges & screws
  • pliers & saw
  • a rasping sound
  • small town & farm
  • the smell of oats
  • factory of oats
  • river industry
  • warehouse & tracks

^

  • blue bottle wooden room
  • 4 white plaster walls
  • worn building
  • a painter
  • a radiator
  • a sink
  • it was like this every morning
  • blue sky
  • pale sink
  • rusted drain
  • glass window
  • worn boots
  • city streets
  • waking
  • aluminum
  • coffee
  • percolator
  • gas flame
  • brown liquid
  • small
  • wooden room
  • 4 white
  • plaster walls
  • blue bottle
  • gray cat
  • painted
  • iron
  • radiator
  • it was like this every morning
  • rain eyes
  • a window
  • sound tunnel
  • coffee
  • white steam

^

  • practice room early light
  • rosin & morning
  • wood & light
  • fragile dusk
  • fleeting blue vision
  • hands in wool
  • worn boots
  • black jacket
  • walking
  • brown eyes
  • urban sky
  • shock of hair
  • wind or rain
  • black road
  • red thoughts
  • a line or thread
  • string or note
  • heart beat
  • pulse
  • vibration
  • sine waves
  • colliding
  • tides & winds
  • turbulence
  • rip tides
  • & gale winds
  • layers of blue
  • & friction
  • blue green pitch
  • plumb line
  • lost anchor
  • horizon
  • drowned
  • tilted
  • white foam
  • where sea
  • turned to sky
  • turned to planets
  • invisible orbits
  • slanted axis
  • mast & sail
  • 3 moons
  • plankton & clouds
  • one lamp
  • turning

^

  • sound is produced
  • by the collision
  • of two bodies

^

  • there was a man
  • bending circuits
  • in the ancient barn
  • blacksmith of sound
  • with rope & pulley
  • wire gods
  • bending gravity
  • into light & heat
  • & pigeons rising
  • from blackened iron
  • black horses
  • concrete
  • & corrugated steel
  • direct current
  • clouds of horses
  • rain on steel
  • over battered stairs
  • frame & joints
  • in a crucifix
  • on thick blue glass
  • in the silo
  • a cyclone
  • of birds

^

  • sanctified x
  • hovering x
  • circling x
  • we were looking
  • for something
  • the post & beam
  • the underlying force
  • light or electricity
  • vector spaces
  • the basis
  • a fixed point
  • a dynamic or web
  • fluid or particles
  • our hands
  • our bodies reaching
  • the mind grasping
  • or releasing the failures
  • there was a vector space
  • an algebra
  • the senses struggling
  • with the mind
  • you could hear
  • a far away sound
  • a siren or hYmn or
  • evening light
  • angels & birds
  • clouds & horses
  • bees
  • vibrating ether
  • xe
  • equals
  • light & electricity & silence
  • or light & pitch & rocks
  • or water & glass & iron
  • or noise particles colliding
  • not knowing
  • if it was simply
  • clusters of energy
  • inflection points
  • fixed states — a stillness
  • gravity pulling
  • poles repelling
  • webs colliding
  • the number zero
  • dancing
  • to a jukebox
  • on red
  • checker board floors
  • & beer signs
  • this radio this night
  • gleaming neon & rain
  • reading the directions
  • seeing the signs
  • blue quaker king of oats
  • a book of stamps
  • cigarettes
  • broken kite
  • melted wax
  • quixotic flight
  • night crow scratching
  • lost translations
  • typing texts
  • black ink
  • parchment
  • a stone
  • scribbled texts
  • formulas illustrations
  • footnotes histories
  • calculations page numbers
  • corner of the world
  • taco stand & map
  • we were there or
  • you are here
  • a location a focal point
  • a certain depth of field
  • in the midst of
  • the vast eternity or
  • 7 layers —
  • infinite skies
  • couldn't just count them
  • or it would take a long time
  • an uncountable number of years
  • to count the layers
  • so many possible answers
  • so many ways to measure things
  • to count the objects
  • to list the objects
  • & often they dissolved
  • into clusters of light
  • staining
  • the surface of things
  • in a radiance
  • that made you
  • lose count
  • lose your grip
  • forget the citation
  • a transfiguration
  • an illumination
  • that left you standing
  • with your heart
  • like a hat
  • in your hands
  • stammering
  • and the window of zero
  • irresistibly compelling
  • glorious sanctified
  • eyes of a crow

^

  • red star
  • black night
  • or lucky strike &
  • bus stop midnight
  • if there were 2 or 3
  • they were ghosts
  • a rising city
  • endless flight
  • heart or sky or cloud
  • canvas or road
  • low blue smoke
  • a railroad track
  • stretching miles
  • across bog
  • & grass
  • & trees
  • slowly reaching
  • dense fog
  • cattail & sedge
  • early morning or dusk
  • night drifting across the world
  • a bridge — still water
  • a hush
  • soundless turning
  • or wind listless through
  • yellowed grasses
  • history rising
  • a story winding past distant rails
  • a low vibration
  • past the heart
  • taut strings released
  • silent bird
  • lonely stream
  • last light
  • dark blade of water
  • night
  • black wing buried in clouds
  • echoed in rivers
  • an infinite & far away sound
  • broken & falling
  • hYmn of birds
  • far away ship & endless sea
  • adrift or in flight
  • the sea the dusty sky
  • stained sea & bleeding sky
  • rising or falling
  • blue gray longing
  • reaching or belief
  • hYmn or wish
  • or cry or breathlessness
  • a sound or line or word
  • great heaving or loss
  • reaching towards vast ends of sea
  • haunted eyes
  • scar or wound or wing
  • echo & ghost
  • etched into caves or body
  • river eyes
  • the sea or boat or bridge
  • a road & sound like light
  • dusty light & window
  • glass or wire
  • silver nets yellow fish
  • light gleaming
  • light threads
  • luminous
  • and haunted
  • not close but far
  • not far but here
  • in this room on this bridge
  • last bird
  • if we never had this place
  • emerald & blue
  • holy dream
  • cloud dream
  • or depths of sea
  • light drowning in layers of sea
  • eyes straining through
  • murky depth
  • a dream of smoky bars
  • neon & rain
  • only ash
  • a cigarette lit or drowned
  • holy dream
  • holy redemption
  • i walked there
  • or i was stained
  • by that river that light
  • now this scar this wound
  • holy imprint
  • a railroad track
  • & grasses
  • bending

^

  • luminous failures
  • wax wings & falling
  • an orchestration or book
  • film or loom
  • or simply a crow
  • & shiny red wrapper
  • degenerate opera
  • endless screeching
  • scraping sounds
  • & pitch salvaged
  • from an auto junkyard
  • forgotten words
  • torn bits of labels
  • abandoned bottles

^

  • in fields of sage
  • whistle &
  • drowned rhythm
  • wheels tracks &
  • pistons turning
  • an iron bird calling
  • through brown
  • sagebrush yellowed stalks
  • limestone & flooded earth
  • heavy snows / late spring
  • flooded tracks
  • gray horse
  • cloistered rider
  • fallen stones & rusted silos
  • industrial wasteland
  • abandoned warehouse
  • fossilized grain
  • skeletons of steel
  • vast plains of destruction
  • raging forces
  • empty husks
  • industrial cyclones
  • & rusted dreams
  • cattle strewn across
  • devastated plains
  • & lost souls clutching
  • suitcases
  • battered frayed
  • broken masts & shopping carts
  • dark & empty malls
  • hollow ringing vacant
  • vast & violent sea

^

  • red shirt
  • black hair
  • slender blade
  • night-laced trembling streets
  • shadow of crow
  • window or sidewalk
  • boot lace & worn denim
  • edge of drainpipe
  • black with soot
  • red with rust
  • white slice of neon
  • cloudy night
  • drop of rain / dusty glass

^

  • green monastery
  • or cloud
  • damp blue mist
  • gray silence
  • black rock
  • jagged white mineral line
  • memory or place
  • near depths
  • shadow canyons
  • blades of light
  • dusty filaments
  • taut lumens
  • holy dissonance
  • chords of silence
  • hallowed bridge
  • web of light & green
  • & stone & rivers
  • spilling across forest floors
  • & rocky cliffs
  • trees lifting past lifetimes
  • into infinite blue nights
  • the bendability of time
  • the synthesis
  • of rock & sun into
  • green & sinew
  • transmigration of mineral
  • & water
  • shadow & light
  • a fluid dynamic
  • a cluster of cells
  • electric photo
  • transmissions
  • criss cross of
  • migrating elements
  • shape shifting forms
  • elemental forces
  • bound fused & released
  • makers of air
  • air looms
  • weaving invisible ribbons
  • falling maps
  • marked by temporary arteries
  • monastic green tent
  • ocean of birds

^

  • my hands were made of
  • bone & pulsing sound
  • i was a red wagon
  • black crow / blue bottle
  • suspended
  • between sound & water
  • or notes & sidewalk
  • there was a word for it
  • but it was far away
  • & people kept moving
  • bridges arched above
  • silver streams /
  • rushing cars
  • loud / relentless /
  • tunnel
  • sound & gravity /
  • echo
  • metallic scream

^

  • a moth throws herself
  • into the closest street lamp
  • lines transect darkness
  • into silver threads
  • voices along wire webs
  • float into stars
  • the world grows close
  • human rivers dry up
  • into 3 strangers
  • gaunt & worn
  • frayed & dissolute
  • mapless wanderers
  • with sandwiches or hope
  • seeking mission signs
  • red neon gospel signs
  • hot coffee
  • steaming paper cups
  • the cool night
  • washes away
  • industry
  • commerce
  • suits & deals
  • angels mend wings
  • in dimly lit bus shelters
  • jesus saves!
  • the endless circle fades
  • death all around us
  • whales & bees
  • & mary / red heart
  • & outstretched hands
  • blue veil
  • blue blue sky
  • an alchemy of blue
  • one last bird
  • electric wires
  • & sea

^

  • language of knot & stone
  • language of birds
  • shadow cloud & wire
  • electric filaments
  • night's blue lantern
  • flux & green mist
  • white horse or silver cloud
  • angels & junkies
  • degenerate streets
  • artists of chaos
  • falling opera
  • broken book
  • wire quartet
  • groan of wood
  • snapped mast & waves
  • a mapless sea
  • red star weeping
  • dusty windows
  • thick plates of glass
  • an opening so slight
  • a vision so fleeting
  • only a line of chalk
  • or a crack in the world
  • a breath or glance or
  • fever
  • fallen feather
  • floating fish
  • wooden skeleton
  • & black ribbons
  • a ghostly day & arid noon
  • strobe-light sun
  • & asphalt steam

^

  • watches for sale
  • broken hYmn
  • broken planet
  • sirens of commerce
  • one last bird
  • & sea

^

  • birds / no birds
  • there was a river with no birds
  • no black raven
  • there was a river with gleaming birds
  • green & blue shore
  • no river
  • no vibrant threads
  • no shore no trees
  • a hole in the sky
  • a heart or bird or door
  • broken window / fallen glass
  • & sky
  • silver fall
  • keening hYmn
  • broken hYmn
  • icarus & luminous flight
  • a low & broken sound
  • dream of life
  • no sky no planet no dream
  • radio pluto
  • graffiti music
  • river icarus
  • wanderer icarus
  • traversals
  • by boat on foot
  • in dreams by train
  • a bridge
  • & water & sky
  • a body
  • broken wings
  • a gender a bird
  • a sound 4 strings
  • a boat
  • wool coat
  • & wind
  • relentless
  • force

^

  • always before tomorrow
  • low siren calls
  • below the surface
  • some moment in history
  • unfolding relentless
  • human tide

^

  • resistance
  • something frayed
  • a friction
  • a tension
  • something broken
  • jagged torn fragmented
  • razed

^

  • close & blurred
  • zero person
  • not first not second not third
  • no map no compass no horizon
  • ephemeral imprint
  • sound & sand & rainfall
  • notes blown about
  • & dissipating
  • notes streaming
  • notes rising
  • falling
  • in corners silence
  • driftless / shady
  • deep pools
  • harmonic ghosts
  • suspended in clouds
  • across the moon
  • tonal palette
  • note clusters
  • probability clouds
  • gravitational forces
  • continuous dynamics
  • sound webs
  • rugged terrains
  • orthogonal chords
  • a calculus of motion
  • the dynamics of waves
  • residue of ghosts
  • a river
  • etched into rock
  • a glacial stain
  • cave drawings
  • subway icarus
  • railway icarus
  • river icarus
  • glassy fires
  • rain & cold
  • rush of color
  • sound & city
  • gleaming city
  • trumpet city
  • alley night
  • hidden streets
  • darkened streets
  • starry night
  • sheets of rain & neon
  • not a lattice
  • but notes falling
  • & dissolving
  • ghosts
  • wind & shadow
  • river bridge
  • improv planes
  • free jazz
  • no map
  • immersion risk lost & hOwl
  • infinite between
  • unbound netherworld
  • harmonic bird
  • tonal bird
  • falling
  • friction
  • gods of chance
  • dark wings
  • dissonant hYmns
  • dusty light
  • threads of light
  • submerged
  • gray shadows
  • illuminated
  • ladders & & . . .
  • graffiti tunnel
  • radio pluto
  • stereo fields
  • resonance / reverberation
  • twisted & splintered
  • lines bent
  • & sea's depth
  • cave drawings
  • black & red
  • ink sky
  • endless sky
  • horses speak to sky

^

  • i often played in bars
  • working people
  • musicians
  • poets
  • inebriated
  • intoxicated
  • otherworldly
  • mesmerized
  • played the
  • wooden beast
  • wild bird
  • tin cup
  • drunken utterances
  • stuttered offerings
  • thick strings
  • piercing hOwl
  • a matter of tension
  • clouds & cyclones
  • pierced night
  • prophets
  • dark & bitter
  • liquid dreams
  • fistfuls of change
  • folded paper
  • feathers
  • sketches
  • poems
  • gifts from strange angels
  • dark & smoky bars

^

  • between
  • a vast landscape
  • sparse or dense
  • infinite between
  • a silence
  • clouds
  • rain
  • particles
  • cluster & scatter
  • twist & rise
  • reverberate

^

  • i was 17
  • when i first
  • walked into a gay bar
  • small dark room
  • smoke & bottles
  • hands eyes
  • sound
  • the room was
  • spinning
  • about some axis
  • warm & close
  • juke box sound & street
  • stained by rain
  • swimming & neon
  • late night dreaming
  • crimson laced
  • blue blue heart
  • awkward waltz
  • dark brown eyes
  • & hidden glances
  • pressed close
  • against
  • dark corners
  • slung low
  • across the night
  • queer
  • not a boy
  • not a girl
  • bird or tree
  • walking
  • pavement lit
  • street lamps
  • signs
  • neon
  • walking
  • river
  • bridge
  • sailor waif poet
  • lucky strike
  • red & black
  • concrete brick
  • blue glass &
  • well-worn locks
  • the bird
  • scrawled
  • red & white & black
  • graffiti angel

^

  • saxophone dreams
  • the man in the psych ward
  • drugged beyond recognition
  • close calls
  • i sang like a bird
  • masked dancer
  • hair shorn
  • notes & words & lines
  • & graphic eyes
  • eternity
  • the blink of an eye
  • a hOwling
  • a hYmn
  • wandering

^

  • a boat
  • full sail
  • keel-furrowed
  • glides across
  • relentless waves
  • itself a wave
  • water & rocky cliff
  • glacial depths & seagulls' cries
  • or slender willow
  • flint fire glass
  • illumined — not far
  • but close
  • it was so hard in the beginning
  • rigging without motion
  • forced scraped awkward
  • but not a bird
  • not a long-necked bird
  • awkward but not beautiful
  • not twisting skyward
  • a flat failure — leaden
  • not grief
  • but a longing
  • i first heard your voice
  • a swan
  • i reached towards you
  • my heart leapt towards you
  • dark angel
  • mine
  • wordless
  • wondrous swan
  • an endless climbing
  • hand over bow
  • wire & wood & sky
  • storm
  • wooden mast
  • splintered against the rock
  • not you but my wings
  • bone & sinew
  • so far to row
  • endless passage
  • resistance
  • a bird
  • but falling

^

  • there were maps
  • black stones thrown
  • across black wires
  • & graphite words
  • graphite numbers
  • graphite language
  • drifting smoke
  • across the worn
  • manuscript
  • 5 line sea
  • there was
  • a room
  • with wooden cabinets
  • filled with maps
  • wooden floor
  • blackened floor
  • dusty light
  • storefront windows
  • cello maps
  • dead hands speaking
  • from fallen stones
  • this world
  • a note in a bottle
  • for cello
  • for viola
  • or oboe
  • other sections
  • other worlds
  • maps stuffed into drawers
  • hard to climb but
  • intoxicating views
  • a whole afternoon
  • finding footholds
  • touching tender stems
  • so far from rain & stone
  • to river
  • the measures
  • hammered
  • chiseled
  • hand to surface
  • small turns
  • smooth glass
  • twisted reach
  • ascension — then river
  • a scattering of ashes
  • dissolution
  • one thousand stars

^

  • between 2 deserts
  • berryman's dream
  • water steel sun

^

  • silence
  • not
  • silence
  • ghosts breathe
  • blankness
  • snow
  • an emptiness or forest
  • trace of birds
  • or cloud
  • or wind
  • silence
  • graphite line
  • drawn on
  • blank paper
  • frayed lines
  • shadow & light
  • graffiti tunnel
  • graffiti angel
  • night angel

^

  • search for iron
  • broken compass
  • or hole in the sky
  • sky tunnel
  • cyclone sky
  • or sand or wolves or nest
  • warped compass
  • bent sound
  • bending trees or waves
  • slate blue cloud & sea
  • a wanderer
  • a stone
  • a cloth
  • the forge the fire
  • the blacksmith
  • welding elements
  • fusing metals
  • now a pond
  • silent &
  • pensive
  • still water or
  • glass
  • not iron
  • brown jade
  • the color of sand
  • a simple sack of feathers
  • a frayed sack of feathers
  • threads woven into branches
  • & flight
  • wax wings
  • pale stone
  • or cloud

^

  • there was a door or heart
  • a cloud or white cloth
  • & wind
  • past mountains
  • an ancient glacier
  • stripped of ice
  • barren rock
  • worn smooth & pale
  • ghost stone
  • ghost cloth
  • ice dreams
  • infused with light
  • once soaked in cloud
  • now sand or
  • balding sun
  • cool moon
  • a nest of dreams
  • lost language
  • brief vision
  • lonely hands
  • a memory
  • extinction
  • ancient seagull's landing
  • ancient ship
  • thread & ink
  • the window the dream
  • the cloud
  • flood of cloud
  • waning light
  • pale stone pale cloth
  • far away
  • there was a glacier
  • now stone
  • there was a cloud
  • now frayed

^

  • pond water & pale translucent stone
  • burlap woven & frayed
  • thread unfurled & drifting
  • hands
  • shadows
  • dimly lit & winter night
  • luminous morning
  • pale ice & summer green
  • cave cloth
  • not snow but rough grass
  • or glacial ice
  • not blue but smooth pale surface
  • opaque & bending
  • surface slowly turning
  • textured — rough & smooth
  • infinite lily pads
  • lily pads spilling across canvas
  • infinite pond
  • & sky
  • water / pigment
  • elemental forms
  • water stone fabric
  • not lake but color
  • not iron but bone
  • stone like bone
  • ancient human
  • cloth or hair
  • or glacier

^

  • blue green marble
  • small planet

^

  • abstraction / between
  • queer
  • cello blue boat
  • boundless sea
  • an intimate biography
  • the infinite between
  • the uncountably infinite
  • degenerate night crow
  • wandering
  • angels
  • the score
  • a circle of fire
  • cello
  • glass bowl
  • coffeepot
  • rusted door
  • tuning fork
  • light color
  • line photos
  • echo filters
  • contrast echo mask
  • holy flight
  • holy dreaming
  • holy threads
  • holy rising
  • holy communion
  • holy echo
  • primal intertwine
  • awkward reaching
  • wings or streets
  • bridge or cloud
  • ascension sea or sky
  • night crow on
  • percussion
  • setting something
  • into vibration
  • by rubbing
  • scraping
  • striking
  • shaking
  • sticks & membrane
  • wood & metal
  • colliding bodies
  • the acoustic
  • significance of material
  • cave tapping
  • cave drawing
  • resonance
  • painting
  • 2 birds
  • last bird
  • & sea
  • far away remembered sea
  • vast & forever sea
  • scratching crow
  • story tapper
  • narrator crow
  • sea conjurer
  • magician
  • broken pump
  • pitch fraying / staining
  • pitch dissolving
  • wild bird ancient bird
  • transfigured night
  • city bent on redemption
  • queer
  • glory
  • broken hYmn falling sky
  • cathedral
  • warehouse
  • this room
  • this communion this fusion
  • hands & breath holy soul
  • holy planet holy now
  • note frayed tonal sky sound cathedral
  • the past stains this place
  • wolf notes awkward sky
  • city lights
  • crow blue sea or stairs
  • cloud cathedral or this room
  • only this gravity
  • only this orbit
  • land resists
  • reed crow
  • this place a cloud
  • wax wings — suspended
  • bow or bone
  • feathers
  • beak or wood
  • missed connections
  • frayed
  • failing
  • missed migration lost orbit
  • friction
  • angel
  • physics & pitch
  • night crow / courier / typographer
  • black ink
  • storyteller / magician / conjurer
  • witness
  • degenerate time
  • fragmented landscape
  • a tapping a scraping
  • beer caps & prism eyes

^

  • you meant to
  • narrate or compose
  • or conduct this piece but
  • once again
  • the bright shiny object
  • the rock almost seemed
  • like language
  • you became a broken well
  • if you
  • tapped or rubbed
  • or scraped this place
  • this ocean could
  • draw water
  • you were going to play
  • the xylophone (pretty bones)
  • instead
  • industry! & glass bowl
  • singing
  • sparse too preoccupied
  • to vibrate
  • near-sighted crow
  • black wings black dots
  • black ink & lines
  • black scrawl
  • you were supposed to be the sea
  • black feathers askew
  • you were supposed to have
  • an orchestra
  • the loom the frame
  • a concerto
  • the risks!
  • bow friction release
  • claw scraped wood & wire
  • harmonic ghosts
  • the infinite between
  • no boat
  • forces pull & resist
  • friction or flight
  • falling
  • ghost bird shadow bird
  • you were supposed to have an orchestra
  • you were going to
  • play the marimba
  • be the sea
  • blue black sea

^

  • 2 monologues
  • twisted & frayed
  • rising vortex
  • communion of souls
  • concerto for stringed instrument
  • & bones
  • an alchemy of sea & flickering light
  • the color of honey
  • ancient papers
  • burlap threads
  • a sack
  • a floating crate
  • harmony
  • a collision
  • an elemental fusion
  • rhythm / a tapping / scratching
  • melody / a frayed call or hOwl
  • alchemical blurring
  • staining each other
  • sound & crow
  • moments & pitch clouds
  • flickering / fading
  • close / disoriented
  • vibrant / wild
  • repeated arc
  • dense thicket
  • off -center
  • skewed
  • close
  • flight / redemption
  • transcendence
  • wanderer hOwl
  • luminous darkness
  • an impulse to flight
  • human resilience
  • the boat the journey
  • sound fragments
  • like dreams
  • staring into each other
  • continuous pool
  • an edge an intensity
  • abstract / gender / queer
  • lens / frame
  • skewed images
  • repeated
  • a boat
  • in the middle
  • of the sea
  • horizon rocking
  • skewed
  • frameless world
  • a falling
  • or ascension
  • the ladder then

^

  • the data structure of dreams
  • episodic
  • glimpse
  • snapshot
  • & flow
  • a film
  • index of images
  • index of sound
  • index of dreams
  • graffiti / angel
  • scattered light & shadow
  • a blankness or silence
  • an emptiness
  • visual incident
  • the voyage out
  • revery
  • dream
  • a fever
  • waking
  • focal point / depth of field
  • stillness / runes
  • screens like quartets
  • or playing cards
  • shadow factory
  • light harp
  • bounds
  • twisting / reaching
  • rubbing / bending
  • a palette
  • a kite
  • silent manifesto
  • elemental forms
  • the boat the wanderer the sanctuary
  • manifest focal point
  • pivot point / inflection point
  • photosynthesis
  • wheel / fire
  • tonal pool
  • immersion
  • st. paul
  • tape delay
  • cello
  • graphite line
  • found sound
  • emergent hYmns
  • 4 part 2 or 3
  • dissonance friction
  • source
  • theater of eternal music
  • in the middle
  • a black music stand
  • lit
  • in darkness
  • shards
  • of broken glass
  • manuscript
  • drawing
  • frame to frame
  • found sound
  • collected sound
  • layered light
  • collage
  • sound clusters
  • gravity & tonal centers
  • kinetic forces
  • web or cloth
  • atmospheres
  • macro rhythms
  • a flow of moments
  • the rush of life / falling
  • mask
  • transmigration of souls
  • a cathedral of sound & light
  • aurally distant
  • long windows or arcs
  • film windows
  • blue windows
  • & sound sources
  • dissolve
  • & stain each other
  • create friction
  • & luminous union / chordal light
  • space & time migration
  • wanderers
  • holy fools
  • graffiti angel / the broken hYmns
  • graffiti angel / cave drawings
  • graffiti angel / house of light
  • graffiti angel / night train
  • graffiti angel / blue window
  • graffiti angel / hOwl
  • street lamp wanderer

^

  • grand gestures
  • faltering flight
  • it was like this every morning
  • the risks the walls
  • & simply
  • jumping
  • into
  • thin air

^

  • ocean wind
  • & grief
  • ahab's dream
  • the gulf
  • breathe / oil
  • tar / feathers
  • black rain
  • asphalt tears
  • floating fish
  • bloody boats
  • drowned birds
  • wire stitches
  • torn cloth
  • tattoo needle
  • neon cloth
  • a short film
  • shadow film
  • you can construct a story
  • in so many ways
  • moving pictures
  • falling pictures
  • elegy or salvation
  • red lines
  • holy lines
  • broken mast
  • holy mast
  • torn sail
  • holy sail
  • foolish ahab
  • holy ahab
  • fool
  • holy fool

^

  • i was queer
  • trans gender bender queer
  • & the planet was
  • dying
  • a heartless species
  • humans
  • i grew up to the sound of body counts
  • grainy black & white
  • television
  • evening news
  • it was like this every evening
  • rivers on fire
  • prisons
  • protests
  • wars
  • a white woman screaming
  • red-faced profanities
  • at a black girl
  • boarding a bus
  • nightly news
  • villages burning
  • orange balls of fire
  • in a jungle
  • gun to head
  • shutter / bang
  • image image image
  • resistance
  • shutter / bang
  • eyes
  • fists
  • words
  • blood
  • tides
  • heart
  • of the beast
  • bowels
  • of the beast
  • helicopter blades
  • tents
  • liquid metal
  • graffiti walls
  • a billion for the bomb
  • food stamps for the baby
  • a prison cell for you
  • rivers on fire
  • locked factories
  • locked out
  • locked in
  • at gunpoint
  • 17th hour dim light
  • a woman sews

^

  • i walked the queer streets
  • at night or
  • dawn
  • on my way to work
  • at the modern times cafe
  • i witnessed
  • i saw
  • i testify
  • i saw
  • & called out
  • helpless
  • at night at dawn
  • i walked the streets
  • paint for the bomb makers & porn shops
  • walking an invisible fluid line between
  • night is an angel
  • a neon prophet
  • suburban cars pausing for prostitutes
  • white boys
  • roaming in packs
  • searching out a stranger
  • alone & queer
  • to beat within an inch of his life
  • rites of manhood for the college set
  • neighborhood housing
  • projects
  • gaunt queer boys
  • coughing pretty boys
  • i walked the fluid line
  • between he & she
  • always queer
  • hey baby
  • i miss you

^

  • saxophones &
  • electrified
  • guitars
  • spilled from
  • summer open doors
  • flung windows
  • curl of smoke
  • rolling papers
  • lysergic dreams
  • i remember your eyes
  • green

^

  • the saxophone player
  • from the psych ward
  • stunned out of
  • his mind
  • on some
  • psychotropic
  • tranquilizer
  • & yet
  • slow sweet sound
  • breath & reeds
  • burnished metal
  • hands & breath
  • sweet poet
  • shuffling poet
  • i remember you
  • in morning
  • awkward groups
  • sun through
  • metal bars
  • your words
  • sweet
  • kind
  • deranged
  • bent winged angel

^

  • & you 4 stringed lantern
  • wooden heart
  • my bones
  • i remember you
  • in hot practice rooms
  • hours & hours
  • & then forsaken
  • lost & forsaken bicycle
  • i can't even say it
  • can't tell you
  • lonely streets
  • wooden boat through
  • skipped school
  • don't talk about it school
  • bully school
  • frayed pitch
  • rough raw broken
  • strange beautiful pitch
  • resinous pitch
  • horse hair wire
  • wood
  • pine blood pitch
  • cat gut & wire
  • pitch

^

  • you have to fail 13 times
  • before you see the ladder
  • & even then
  • you can't reach
  • the last rung

^

  • frayed rope
  • musical line split
  • & frayed
  • & filtered
  • through water
  • contrast color
  • filter blur echo
  • the canvas of
  • river & street

^

  • my hands were made of
  • ambiguity
  • geometry
  • a distance
  • a confluence
  • a mapless continuity
  • complicity & resistance
  • cluster of birds
  • pulse
  • a flux
  • atoms
  • carbon
  • dissipating
  • heat
  • or torch & ice
  • a glacier
  • drowning
  • in its own red sea
  • so difficult to utter
  • such grief

^

  • 3 moons
  • skewed horizon
  • incoherence
  • near / far
  • unpinned
  • sound is like
  • a ragged line
  • stain of red
  • wash of ink
  • my hands were birds
  • no birds
  • my hands were rivers
  • no rivers
  • my hands were
  • bone & pulsing sound
  • a cacophony of horses
  • across blue sky